wait wait wait

I've never written for so long -- took me two years to have another blog entry. I missed writing and it's vacation from school so.. I decided to write down something.

-----------

What's taking so long?

I'm sure you've thought of something that you're yearning to have for a long time. It could be anything -- the one you love, that degree or a job promotion (or you're probably hoping for an office mate whom you hate resign from work). Waiting does not cover fixed days or dates, months or years -- but it could be short depending on the thing or the person you wait for.

Why am I writing this? Well, there are a lot of people there like me waiting for something. I'm waiting for my graduation (4 years max), waiting for my boyfriend to pop the question (not the time), waiting for the country's leaders to prove themselves to us and waiting for my shift at work to end. Waiting (patience) is a virtue. A lot of my friends would say, "ang tagal", but later on they would say, "ang bilis ng panahon." It's because if you're busy, everything moves like a bullet train. Waiting would just take seconds or minutes.

For you not to think that this short essay is a piece of junk, waiting is painful. It is a long and winding road yet it teaches us to be patient before we get that gold medal or that promotion or a clean government. Waiting is also a test of patience on how long are you willing to wait for the right time to do things. (hmm, how long are we going to wait for a clean government though).

Take for example going to graduate school and you wanted to send yourself to school without the support from your parents. How long are you going to save money? It took me a year. Along the way, you'll get tired and probably thought, "I'm not earning enough" and give up on your dreams. Where's that determination you had in the first place? Waiting has killed you? Weak.

Yeah, waiting is a killing machine. You get tired of waiting, you lose the will to wait and got lazy. When you're at work, there are times that you just want to go home and be less productive. Sometimes you feel like not going to work because you've set your mind that "I'm doing the same thing again today". Or when you're at school, you'll often say that you're lazy to study. But hey, the good thing about waiting is hope, if you'll look at life positively. Hoping and waiting come together -- they make every single moment count. What does that mean? Well, it's like a light at the end of the tunnel that despite the long and dark road, you'll always find your way back.

If you're a student and graduated, it means you have survived the painstaking years of waiting for that toga. Your parents had successfully did a great job in sending you to school, in waking up every single day hitting your ass to get up, and making breakfast for you so you don't skip meals. If you're at work and you got promoted, your efforts were recognized and it's your time to shine. Promotion is also a long process, also takes a long time waiting, but later on you'll realize that everything pays off.

What I'm trying to say is, waiting is not such a bad thing if you look at life positively. When things don't go right, take some steps back and ask what went wrong. But if you think things are going right and it's not just the way you wanted it to be, trust it. Well, you may not know what's in store for you there. Life is full of unpredictable moments and surprises.

And while you wait and do something for your dream, spend your time wisely. Meaning, you enjoy life, have fun, travel (though travel also makes you wait but at least you get motivated every time you see your travel dates), and others. I hope your dreams motivate you despite the storms and bad days in your daily life. Make yourself busy. If love doesn't come yet, there's no harm in waiting. It'll come at times you don't expect it (even a new job). Then you'll tell yourself later after seeing everything you've done that it's worth the wait.

By the way, going back to the question on until when are we going to wait for a clean government. No one knows! And that fellas is what you call waiting painfully for idealistic dreams.


*EXCEPTION*
Don't tell your parents "wait lang", you'll get hit by any object they touch. Prepare for battle, they don't have all day.

Discourage me.

Discourage me.

Discourage me and I'll prove that I'll be unfazed. Discourage me and I will tell you that you failed to do so. Discourage me and I'll make you eat your words.

Discourage me, but I'll be encouraged.

We all have our freedom to do what we want and to do what we feel we need to do. No one can stop us to be an achiever. Whatever it takes, we will find ways to reach that dream, no matter how many people try to bring us down.

People who feed others with negativity doesn't see their worth. Everybody is worth encouraging to push them to success. Discouraging is a sign of failure and lack of improvement.

As an advice to the millennials out there who are being discouraged, ironically do otherwise. I have been discouraged twice, but I have proven them wrong.

12MN

Alas dose

NLM

Dakong alas dose ng hatinggabi

Ako'y nagkubli

Dahil hindi mapakali

Nangangamba sa bawat sandali

Sa dilim, narinig ko

Sa dulo ng aking kwarto

"Tulungan mo ako"

Sino ba iyong naririnig ko?

Nagtaklob ako ng kumot

Dahil sa takot

Katawan ko'y nanlalambot

Paulit-ulit, nakakayamot

"Tulungan mo ako"

Tumatayo na ang balahibo ko

Lubayan mo ako

Bumalik ka sa pinanggalingan mo

Nawala ang bulong

At paghingi ng tulong

Pero ako pa rin ay nagkulong

Sa loob ng kumot at nakikiramdam sa bulong

Umalis ako sa aking pagkubli

Ngunit ako'y nagkamali

Dahil siya'y nasa aking tabi at ako'y napatili 

Dakong alas dose ng hatinggabi. 

#MidnightPoetry 

THE GHOST EMPLOYEE

Natatakot na ako. Tuwing Sabado ng gabi lagi akong natatakot.

Alam ko talagang dalawa kaming naka-duty sa trabaho kapag Sabado ng gabi, pero bakit parang ako lang mag-isa? May kasama ba talaga ako o wala? 

Okay lang ba ako o hindi? Iniisip ko minsan baka baliw na ako eh.

Nangyayari ito tuwing papatak ang alas otso ng gabi, oras na ng shift. Hindi ko talaga alam, pero biglang may magsasabi sa akin ng hello, magandang gabi. Sh*t! Nandyan na siyaaaa! Tumatayo na ang balahibo ko. 

Tapos, ito pa ang malupit, katabi ko pa siya! Nagagalit na ako kasi wala naman siyang ginagawa sa aking tabi. Buong gabi akong nagtatrabaho samantalang siya ay naghihilik. Doon talaga ako natatakot, parang katabi ko si Barney na naging zombie.

Hindi ako magpapadala sa aking takot dahil kailangan ko siyang gisingin. Alam kong wala siyang pakiramdam dahil isa na siyang multo, paghihilik lamang ang ginagawa niyang pagpaparamdam. 

Pero alam niyo po mga kaibigan, nalilito din po ako. Maski kasi siya na multo, ay natataranta rin dahil sinasabi ko na tama na ang paghihilik at magtrabaho na. Ito po ang tanong ko: ako na tao ay takot sa multo o siya na multo ay takot sa tao?

Yun lamang po. Ngayon ko lang po napagtanto ang literal na ibig sabihin ng 'ghost employee'.

ONE

ONE

Nicole L. Manano

(Credits, please!) 

It starts with one..

It's not a song

It just ends with one.

Like me, all Saturday night long.

Maybe two is better than one..

No, because one is better than two

Believe me it's fun

To be alone than be with you.

I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream

No, you can't conceal your identity

You're the nightmare in my dream

It's like I'll enter the world of insanity.

I'm know I'm not the only one

But why do I feel like one?

I can't even waddle away from this misery

Because I have to accept this sad reality.

P,S,

   I dedicate this poem to a fellow employee who makes you feel alone when there's really two of you who are on-duty on a Saturday night. Such a miserable Saturday. 

FRUSTRATION

WITTY

By NLM

(Credits, please!)

I don't know why
I like a guy
Who is ugly
But witty

I don't know why
Words make me fly
But I always try
To not be so shy

I don't know why
I want to die
When you look me in the eye
Damn, I just want to sigh

I don't know
With your bright mind, I just like you so
Even you don't have a handsome face to show
And that sucks, though.

TRAFFIC
By NLM

(Credits, please!) 

I'm stuck in traffic
And it makes me sick
I already look like a freak
I only need to shriek

Hours pass by
And I want to cry!
Although my throat is dry
All I can do is sigh

I have deadlines to adhere to
So the government should adhere to the traffic too
Is that so hard to do?
Jeez, we voted for you!

I'm already late
And I still haven't ate!
Great, this is what I hate
What's wrong in this state?

THE BEEP CARD: BOOM OR DOOM?

Beep Card: Boom or Doom?

       The Light Rail Transit Authority and Metro Rail Transit recently activated the new ticketing system, popularly known as Beep. Since its activation, how was the performance of Beep so far?

       Beep is a reloadable smart card created to replace the old magnetic cards that is used for paying fares in rail transit transportation in Metro Manila. This card has two types, the single journey and the stored value card that can be purchased through the ticketing machines provided in the various train stations.

       Beep is also known as the "tap-and-go" card, because people would just tap the card on the turnstile machine and they can go. Take note that this is ONLY applicable to stored value cards, not the single journey ones. The single journey ones still follow the old-style way by inserting the card on the turnstile machine.

       Yes, LRT's new ticketing machines had been taken to the next level of technological advancement, but it received negative feedback from netizens, especially today.

       Beep machines were already placed in train stations way back summer of 2015. But, even these machines are still covered in plastic, it was already bashed by the public. (I have to admit this photo is true, but we all got a sliver of hope that this would be better than the old one.) (Credits to the owner of the photo.)

       But when it began operating on July, all of us wished to have the old ticketing system back.

       Here are the rules of the old ticketing system:
       1) Buy a magnetic card, single journey or stored value.
       2) Insert it in the turnstile machine and off you go.
       3) For stored value card holders, you get to have a free ride on the last remaining one peso or five peso amount in your card.

       For Beep (stored value card):
       1) Buy the card, and separately buy the load for your card.
       2) If someone ahead of you tapped the card on the turnstile machine, you have to wait for two seconds before you tap yours. You have to wait for the green arrow to appear, then you can tap and go.
       3) If your card doesn't reach the needed amount for your destination, you have to reload it first. Worse, if your card has enough amount for the next station, but not on the last station, you have to reload it before making your way out.
       4) Sorry, no more free ride for you.

       My hope for a better ticketing system suddenly vanished. I am just one of those commuters that is suffering the wrath of Beep everyday. We all know that MRT and LRT 1 always have this legendary crowd control and long lines of people buying tickets everyday. Long before Beep was announced, the ticketing machines were already closed and people have to line up to the Passenger's Assistance Office to purchase tickets. Due to these two or three long lines, there are times that you don't even know which of these leads to the PAO or the entrance to the station or to the turnstiles. Damn it.

The legendary Line of Doom at the Santolan Station LRT Line 2. (Aug. 24, 2015)

       In this time of the Beep card, the long lines have doubled and crowd controls were worse than the stampede at Ultra. Worse, most of the new turnstiles and ticket machines are not open for operations. What? Why?

       Let me tell you my story.

       The Santolan station in LRT 2 is jam packed that morning, and heat is circulating inside the station. I was running late for school and I still have to reload my Beep card. Out of the five or six machines on the right side of the station, only three of it were working.

       A man suddenly had an outburst while facing the 5th machine for it suddenly stopped operating. I was in line on the first machine, but after a few minutes, I had never felt any progress on getting nearer the machine. I'm starting to get irritated for I'll be late in class again. I watched an employee approach the 5th machine and the man, then tried fixing the machine, but with no luck. I looked behind me and saw a "snakes and ladders" kind of line that goes all the way out of the station. Not a good sight.

       The man began shouting, "Ang dami-dami nitong machine niyo bakit iilan lang ang gumagana?! Tapos pipila pa ako ng pagkahaba-haba dito sa kabila?!" A police officer told him to just fall in line on the Passenger's Assistance Office and get a card. Still, he has to fall in the long and winding line. Poor guy.

       When he left, a female employee that was standing beside the first machine grinned to her fellow employee and said, "Ano sabi sayo? Pabayaan mo siya magwala." Okay, I want to punch her face. Provide a better service first before you utter those words. Hey, we are your customers! Watch your manners!

       When I finally reloaded my card, I need to go back to find the end of the line for the turnstiles. I need to get away from the rude employee, or else I would have made an outburst too.

       Shit, I'm really late. I don't understand why the lines are too long, but upon seeing the six or seven turnstiles, only two are working. Wow, so much for a new ticketing system.

       Many people around me are already complaining, shouting, but Beep employees doesn't address their complaints. Why implement a new system when not all machines are available for operations? Or, why activate the machines if they're not yet ready?

       Another cause of delay are the people lining up for the turnstiles. Some people are tapping the single journey card or inserting the stored value card on the machines, and the employees would tell them the right way. It's taking time, for people are still used to the old ticketing system, and maybe love it still than adapting to this new one.

       On my other LRT journey story, I was in line with a woman complaining and shouting to the employee saying, "Nale-late lagi ang mga tao dito dahil sa sistema na to eh! Bago nga, di naman ginagamit yung iba! Para saan pala itong iba dito? Display? Design?!" The employee apologized but the woman kept on ranting, "Sorry kayo nang sorry, ayusin niyo ito!"

       Other passengers in line were silent, merely because silence means yes.

You and me, baby, we're stuck like glue.

       If the management of LRT and MRT thinks that Beep has managed to lessen the doomed lines in their train stations, well think again. Train fares have increased but the service is not enough. Aside from the complaints of people regarding Beep, most of the escalators aren't working and the trains' airconditioning is not open. I'll never forget the day when I went out from the train looking like a glazed doughnut. No matter how much I try to fan myself, the air that my fan gives is also hot. Worst idea.

       Just a simple suggestion to the authorities, kindly make the service worthwhile. Fix the escalators and open the airconditioning. Have all the turnstiles and machine work. If these are all working, then maybe Beep won't be a problem. Also, buy new trains! Where does our money go then? Are you saving it for a new set of trains aside from the new MRT prototype trains from China (jeez) or keeping it in your pockets? Why buy the ticketing system first but not assess the needs of people for more trains? You can control the crowd, yes, but not the growing population.

       And for the commuters, change is gradual. Sometimes we have no choice but to adapt to what is served for us. Today we complain, but tomorrow we may not. Though some of us may still don't know how to use Beep, we will learn in the process and get used to it soon.

       Soon sounds a long time, but let's just go with the flow, shall we?